This apple eats humans.

This apple is big. I tried taking a picture of it next to my face to show the comparison, but the apple was making me look bad. Haha! I don’t know if you know this about me, but I love crunch noises. I think they are hilarious. I love celery, chips (Doritos to be specific), and apples. Shut yo face!

MA...give me 99¢!

This store will provide you with items that are 99¢ and your mother will be waiting inside…most likely to provide you with the money to buy your 99¢ items.

Go ahead. Make yourself at home.

Things like this happen to me all the time. This is my dad’s doing. There isn’t much I can say other than look how big his feet are!!! Impressive, sir, impressive. ::honk honk honk:: <—goose impersonation

NUFF said!

Tonight turned out to be an unexpected peeyourpants kinda night. I had to drop something off of at a friends house, but I ended up staying for hours. We told stories and laughed hysterically all night. I had a few close calls where I came close to actually peeing in my pants from laughing so hard. Haha! I love it when new people come into my life and I find them to be really good confidants. This quote is from a ridiculous quote book that Zig Ziglar put together. We were reading a few of the quotes to get some more laughs out of the night. I have no idea what it means. And for those of you who want to take the time to explain it to me…please…please don’t! I want to remain in my dummy cloud.

You would look hot in one of these!

Today I took the time to replenish my tshirt supply in my merch(andise) suitcase. This past weekend I went to Williamsport, PA to play a private gig…yea that’s right…I’m high profile. Haha! I sold a gazillon tshirts. Which for those of you who don’t know, tshirts are the best way of making money at performances. So, needless to say, it was a good night for me.

I had to get an actual count of how many shirts I have in stock because I’m FINALLY about to launch my online store this week. It’s been “coming soon” for the past 9 years on my website. I mean, why rush? Hahaha! I’ll keep you posted!

Oui!

I’ve been a big fan of french bread lately. I’ve been making my own croutons. I’ve also been dicing it and coating it with olive oil and grinder salt n’ pepper…and eating it without toasting. Sooooo good! I’ve been eating like a pig lately. This bread has contributed to my piggy-ness!

Look...I'm smiling!!!

Yes, I know if may seem strange…I’m an artist….and I like football. My love for football has grown in the past few years. I mostly watch it by my lonesome cause I don’t really enjoy people screaming the whole time. I’ve always been a Giants fan (hate if you must). It runs in my family. Haha! Tonight was the first time all season I watched a game with friends. I have to say, it was really enjoyable. There was screaming, but no one getting mad and breaking things. This photo makes me laugh cause I can’t believe I captured the single moment when Tom Coughlin didn’t look like he had to poop.

The classic onion volcano!!!!!

Tonight I had the craziest Hibachi experience of my Hibachi going life. The entire party filled both Hibachi tables at the restaurant. There was lots of fire and screaming…no one was burned. Although, a few individuals might of had their eyebrows singed off. Haha! I laughed so hard throughout night that I my stomach hurt. I was surrounded by awesome people and stuffed my face with food. I’m pretty sure I won’t need to eat for a week. My heart flutters when my dinner involves an onion volcano.

If you are in need of some self-cleaning...don't do it here!

I ventured into NYC tonight. I normally drive in, but where I was headed to it didn’t make sense. I met up with a good friend for dinner and then went to an event for Women in Music (a really cool organization of ladies trying to support each other in the music industry). Before heading home I had to use the bathroom at NY Penn Station…which is usually not an enjoyable experience….BUT I came across this lovely sign that told me what I couldn’t do in the bathroom. Hehehe.